Why I Had Sex Reassignment Surgery

I was born transsexual and when you get through all the layers of psychobabble and rationalization, all the talk about gender this and gender that, being born transsexual meant I felt intensely uncomfortable in my own skin.

I was pretty feminine even before I came out and started hormones.

I’ve heard a lot of people who don’t want or need SRS ask, “What difference does it make?  Who sees what is between my legs except for me and my partner?”

And you know they have a point…

The reality is I had SRS to feel at home in my own body.

I didn’t do it expecting some package of rights and privileges, hell in 1972 there was no guarantee that I would get any rights or privileges as a result of SRS.

I’ve said all this a hundred times before.

Today a quote caught my eye: “There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.”  Hemingway.

Today Monica Helms wrote she has been Monica full time for 15 years.  That’s something in a world that is a bit harder for those who don’t get SRS than it is for those who do.

I’ve seen her change a lot over the years, mellow out, fight for lots of different causes, generally become a wiser person.

I withdrew from the Transwars not because the radicals quoting Transgender Borg Dogma, but because I saw that most Trans-Activists weren’t. Instead they were talking about fairness and equality, they were also getting involved in other causes as well.

They were talking about the same issues of equality, health care, housing, employment, marriage, and social justice I care about.

I never much liked the HBS set because they sounded like a bunch of Ayn Rand worshiping right wingers.

When they talk about post-op rights they sort of make it sound like it was an accessory package added to the base price of a car.  Something you had to purchase the car to get.

That doesn’t  line up very well with my values which include the idea that equal rights and protections shouldn’t be something limited to certain groups while denied to others based on the color of their skin, the shape of their genitals or the amount of money they have.

Today the Republicans blocked the Pay Check Fairness Act from coming to a vote in the Senate.  They said that approximately half the people in this country didn’t deserve to have their rights protected based on the shape of their genitals, or if you will, their gender.

That is not equality.

I am horrified that CeCe McDonald is being put in men’s prison for defending herself from being assaulted/murdered by a Nazi and his gang of thugs.

CeCe is an example of the multiple intersects of oppression. Race, class, cis-sexism the presumption of guilt rather than innocence. They didn’t even give her the right to defend herself.  Had the Nazi murdered her he would in all likelihood have been sentenced to less time.

It sort of seems when people are all obsessed with being better than other people because of something they had the money to buy, in this case SRS, then they are sort of placing the wrong value on SRS.

I mean, “Did you get it to feel whole and comfortable in your own skin, or did you get it to use as a status symbol that conveys greater rights and privileges?”

What exactly have you learned, how have you grown as a person?

It would be very easy to look at the pain I experience over the years with that Ayn Rand sort of view that says, “I had to suffer why shouldn’t the next person?”

Except my friends who went through the same sort of pain are all dead. There but for fortune go I.

Empathy for the suffering of others is something I’ve learned.  Compassion was shown me when I was hitting bottom.

Giving the same compassion to others and showing the same empathy that was shown me seems a far better path to walk than spending my time beating up on others who have a harder life than I have.

I’ve traveled the circle back to the values I sought to live when I was a young hippie woman living in Berkeley.

I’ve learned to ignore the idea that I am superior to others just because I had a little luck that they didn’t.

Hemingway was right. It is better to strive to be better than you were before than it is to try to be better than others so you can heap scorn upon them.

5 Responses to “Why I Had Sex Reassignment Surgery”

  1. Flow In Says:

    beautfully said, suzan

    • Suzan Says:

      Thanks… I get tired of people talking about SRS like it was a car that comes with an accessory package called rights. Human rights and equality shouldn’t have a price tag or a cost of admission, they should be the rights of people just because they are people.

  2. deena17 Says:

    I agree. I have not lived my life for it to be compared to others. I have also learned that patience is the other side of wisdom. Those that deserve to destruct will generally self destruct given a little time.

    • Suzan Says:

      I get tired of the people who think getting SRS gives them a license to be vicious to others. There are a few in particular who make a career out of being the transsexual auxiliary for either the Taliban Christians or the radfems.

      It just gets boring.

  3. Lynn Says:

    This article is reminiscent of the one on why it is quite all right to want to be pretty, and that it is only natural to be aroused by sexy garments.

    Like that article this one is similar to me in that it regards something I take for being inherently true, due to living a rather lonely life, but forget that others may have issues or gripes with, perhaps even causes. It’s nice to read someone putting it well, far better than I could, and putting it out there, as I never would.

    I have no point. Simply feel I ought to thank you Suzan, for this article and many like it, always makes my days a bit less bleak and the world seem a bit less cruel; it is alarmingly rare to encounter genuine empathy, probably because it requires understanding to differentiate itself from one of the useless forms sympathy.


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