Thoughts on TS/TG Regreters Who Blame Doctors

Time to call Bullshit.

Yes there are people who detransition, people who start transitioning and realize it is not for them or that they don’t actually want SRS and are happy with their original genitals.

There are people who go back and forth over a life time, sometimes due to family dynamics, sometime due to the inability to pass and survive as a member of the sex they would prefer to be.

These people are not the problem.

Further as ultimately sad as the story may be neither are the people who detransition and/or can’t handle transition and commit suicide.

If anyone bears some measure of responsibility for those people it might be those who paint too rosy a picture of the joys of transition without pointing out the hardships that too often accompany transition.

In the late 1960s and early 1970s many transsexuals encountered their first psychiatric screening after being accepted into a surgery program.

In 1969 I spoke with a clinical social worker for about a half hour prior to having a doctor hand me hormones. This social worker spent most of his time telling me about social services I could access and the process of changing sex.

I also saw Dr. Benjamin.  I had been on hormones about four months or so and had been full time for about a month or so.  When he first met me he asked why I had come to see him.  I told him I was transsexual and wanted to have a sex change operation.  He looked confused and asked, “Why would a lovely young woman like you want to become a man?”

He went on to tell me how I was a perfect candidate for SRS, one of the most flawless transsexuals he had ever met.

Then…

Here it comes…

I would still have to live as a woman for at least a year before he would even consider writing a surgery recommendation for me.

I was young and pretty and caused gender identification problems for people trying to figure out what sex I was prior to my coming out.  Passed effortlessly and the most trusted doctor in the world at the time, the authority on transsexualism, first tells me how flawless I am, then tells me I still had to do at least a year long “Real Life Test”.

When I was in the Stanford Program there was a sister, who the people at Stanford considered their perfect Transsexual, a role model for the rest of us.  She had been married to a woman and fathered two lovely children.  She was still with her wife and children, employed as a highly trained professional, respected in her field.

A few years later there was a horrible accident involving her family that threw her life into utter chaos and nearly cost her and her wife parental rights to raise their children.  She wound up detransitioning.

Another person, who had SRS claimed it was all a mistake, sued the doctors and threatened Dr. Laub’s life.

Now people are required to follow the rules called the Standards of Care.

These rules require a far more extensive psychiatric work up than people of my generation were required to undergo.

The regreters  who blamed the doctors and sued are a contributing factor regarding this requirement.

So all TS/TG people have to pay for the bad judgement of a few people who may have been caught up in some strange “gender euphoria” and got carried away.

The problem is that people lie.  People self deceive while caught up in this weird “gender euphoria” and imagine these perfect lives they are going to have.

I had to sign a medical release prior to SRS that warned me of every possible problem they thought might arise.  I had to have a lawyer there to make certain I understood what I was signing.

I imagine the medical consent form is far longer today after so many of the doctors we depend upon have been sued by the regreters.

The tragic few regreters, who have made life much more difficult for the majority of transsexual people, perhaps it is time to turn the microscope upon them.

It isn’t hair.  If you get something cut off it isn’t going to grow back like an octopus who has lost part of a tentacle.

If you lie to the doctor you might well be able to deceive them.  Even sisters and brothers who have been around TS/TG people for many years are deceived by the liars who have taken the stories of others and woven them into a believable autobiography.

No one dealing with TS/TG people ever promises a rose garden.  They became disillusioned many years ago and stopped having fantasies of our having easy lives sometime in the mid-1970s.

If you get involved with some sort of insanely homophobic/transphobic religion and decide the surgery was a mistake,go to an Atheist for religious deprogramming, before going to a fucking lawyer to sue the doctor, who operated on you in good faith, based on the information you gave him/her.

Take some personal responsibility.  Stop blaming other people if you lied and deceived your way into getting SRS.  It is your own damned fault.  Own it.

People subjected you to the Standards of Care.  If you bypassed them you took the same sort of risk a person takes sky diving without lessons or training.  If it works out great, if it doesn’t you are the one who played fast and loose with measures that were put in place to help prevent you from making a mistake.

You are the one who made the mistake.  You are the one who has to live it.

Doctor under fire for alleged errors prescribing sex-change hormones

BTW It was cases like this that led to those odious Standards of Care with the excessive Psychiatric screening in the first place.

The patient should be told no deal, no grounds for a law suit.  Any fool should realize the enormity of taking hormones and having sex reassigning surgery even if only on one’s secondary sexual characteristics.  It shouldn’t be up to the doctor to figure out you were deceiving him/her by pretending to be transsexual.

From The Guardian UK:  http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2013/jan/06/transexualism-gender-reassignment-richard-curtis

Dr Richard Curtis is under investigation following complaints over treatment of patients seeking gender reassignment


The Guardian, Sunday 6 January 2013

A woman who alleges that she was inappropriately prescribed sex-changing hormones and then wrongly underwent a double mastectomy is one of several complaints being investigated by the General Medical Council about the doctor who oversaw her aborted gender reassignment, the Guardian has learned.

The GMC, the doctors‘ professional regulator, has received at least three separate complaints against Dr Richard Curtis, a London GP who specialises in the treatment of gender dysphoria, particularly transsexualism. The complaints concern the alleged inappropriate administering of sex-changing hormones to patients and at least one allegedly unsuitable referral for gender reassignment surgery.

It is claimed that Curtis, who provides private treatment to patients seeking gender reassignment, failed to follow accepted standards of care and breached conditions placed on his practice by the Medical Practitioners Tribunal Service (MPTS), the GMC’s arm’s-length disciplinary body.

The allegations include commencing hormone treatment in complex cases without referring the patient for a second opinion or before they had undergone counselling, administering hormone treatment at patients’ first appointments, and referring patients for surgery before they had lived in their desired gender role for a year, as international guidelines recommend. One patient allegedly underwent surgery within 12 months of their first appointment. He is also accused of administering hormones to patients aged under 18 without an adequate assessment, and wrongly stating that a patient seeking gender reassignment had changed their name.

One of the most serious cases concerns a female patient who regrets switching to a male role. She underwent hormone treatment and had her breasts removed. The woman is one of the complainants in the current GMC investigation.

Continue reading at:  http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2013/jan/06/transexualism-gender-reassignment-richard-curtis

GetEQUAL To Obama: Hagel’s Anti-LGBT History Makes Him Unacceptable For Defense

From The New Civil Rights Movement:  http://thenewcivilrightsmovement.com/1-getequal-to-obama-hagels-anti-lgbt-history-makes-him-unacceptable-for-defense/politics/2013/01/04/57737

by David Badash
on January 4, 2013

GetEQUAL, the LGBT civil rights organization that is widely credited for helping repeal Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, today told President Obama they strongly oppose Chuck Hagel as Secretary of Defense. Hagel has a history of anti-LGBT comments, for which he recently apologized in the wake of his name being floated to replace Leon Panetta.

“GetEQUAL strongly opposes the potential nomination of Chuck Hagel to become the next Secretary of Defense,” Tanya Domi, GetEQUAl chair said today via a statement. “Hagel has, time and time again, taken every opportunity to lambast and denigrate lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) Americans, and the Cabinet is no place for this kind of disrespect.

“Hagel’s recent apology for his insulting comments about the nomination of James Hormel as U.S. Ambassador to Luxemborg were hollow, politically expedient, and nakedly gratuitous,” Domi, a former Army officer and 15-year veteran, added. “The Defense Department has made important strides toward creating an inclusive Armed Forces, but has miles left to go — nominating Hagel to lead the Defense Department would be a staggering step backward for the LGBT community and an upheaval of President Obama’s past support for the LGBT community.”

 During his years in Congress, Hagel consistently opposed the advancement of civil rights for LGBT Americans. A Hagel nomination would throw President Obama’s support for LGBT civil rights into deep suspicion. Following yesterday’s signing of an NDAA that includes a new “conscience clause” designed to permit discrimination in the military by chaplains, the LGBT community is looking for leadership at the Defense Department that will remove discriminatory practices from the Armed Forces — not cement those practices.
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Marriage equality’s biggest foe sees she can’t fight the new family values

From Daily Kos:   http://www.dailykos.com/story/2013/01/06/1176169/-Marriage-equality-s-biggest-foe-sees-she-can-t-fight-the-new-family-values

Scott Wooledge
Sun Jan 06, 2013

The nationally syndicated column of Maggie Gallagher, founding president and board chair of the National Organization’s (NOM), is no more. As of Wednesday, syndicator Universal Uclick will no longer be distributing it to the 25-35 papers that carried it.

This is notable because this is another data point reinforcing the conclusion that hardcore social conservatives in general, and National Organization for Marriage in particular, are increasingly becoming marginalized and irrelevant in the national political dialogue.

Speaking with Huffington Post, Gallagher says newspapers are a dying media. She seems to comprehend the gravity of the losses her cause has suffered and says, ” I wanted more time to think. So many people are flailing, I want time to think,” and “I’m considering other projects, but I haven’t made any decisions.”

After NOM experienced what can only be described as a routing in 2012, the front woman for the anti-gay marriage movement is doing a pretty terrible job maintaining her game face. She has predicted that the Defense of Marriage Act will fall at the Supreme Court, courtesy of Justice Kennedy (and maybe Justice Roberts as well, she says). And Wednesday’s column seemed to be more evidence a sense of inevitable doom has overcome her, one that she can’t be bothered to hide. The exact title to her column is “This I believe: Farewell to Optimism.”

It isn’t a particularly unique column, just sort of an overview of her philosophies with regards to the “family values” movement. She speaks in simple declarative sentences: “Every life is precious.” “Men and women are different.” “Sex makes babies.” “On every key measure, marriage is weaker.”

Continue reading at:  http://www.dailykos.com/story/2013/01/06/1176169/-Marriage-equality-s-biggest-foe-sees-she-can-t-fight-the-new-family-values

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The Blessings of Atheism

From The New York Times:  http://www.nytimes.com/2013/01/06/opinion/sunday/the-blessings-of-atheism.html

By SUSAN JACOBY
Published: January 5, 2013

In a recent conversation with a fellow journalist, I voiced my exasperation at the endless talk about faith in God as the only consolation for those devastated by the unfathomable murders in Newtown, Conn. Some of those grieving parents surely believe, as I do, that this is our one and only life. Atheists cannot find solace in the idea that dead children are now angels in heaven. “That only shows the limits of atheism,” my colleague replied. “It’s all about nonbelief and has nothing to offer when people are suffering.”

This widespread misapprehension that atheists believe in nothing positive is one of the main reasons secularly inclined Americans — roughly 20 percent of the population — do not wield public influence commensurate with their numbers. One major problem is the dearth of secular community institutions. But the most powerful force holding us back is our own reluctance to speak, particularly at moments of high national drama and emotion, with the combination of reason and passion needed to erase the image of the atheist as a bloodless intellectual robot.

The secular community is fearful of seeming to proselytize. When giving talks on college campuses, I used to avoid personal discussions of my atheism. But over the years, I have changed my mind because such diffidence contributes to the false image of the atheist as someone whose convictions are removed from ordinary experience. It is vital to show that there are indeed atheists in foxholes, and wherever else human beings suffer and die.

Now when students ask how I came to believe what I believe, I tell them that I trace my atheism to my first encounter, at age 7, with the scourge of polio. In 1952, a 9-year-old friend was stricken by the disease and clinging to life in an iron lung. After visiting him in the hospital, I asked my mother, “Why would God do that to a little boy?” She sighed in a way that telegraphed her lack of conviction and said: “I don’t know. The priest would say God must have his reasons, but I don’t know what they could be.”

Just two years later, in 1954, Jonas Salk’s vaccine began the process of eradicating polio, and my mother took the opportunity to suggest that God may have guided his research. I remember replying, “Well, God should have guided the doctors a long time ago so that Al wouldn’t be in an iron lung.” (He was to die only eight years later, by which time I was a committed atheist.)

Continue reading at:   http://www.nytimes.com/2013/01/06/opinion/sunday/the-blessings-of-atheism.html

Idle No More Actions Target Bridges, Movement Vows ‘We Are Here to Stay’

From Common Dreams:  http://www.commondreams.org/headline/2013/01/05-1

Series of actions on Saturday shuts down US-Canadian bridge

Andrea Germanos, staff writer
Published on Saturday, January 5, 2013 by Common Dreams
Idle No More continues its momentum with a series of demonstrations on Saturday including one that has shut down a US-Canadian bridge as the movement continues its demands for Indigenous sovereignty.CBC News reports that police closed the International Bridge in Cornwall, Ontario, when at least 100 protesters marched there, and adds that other international bridges will be sites of actions as well:

  • The Peace Arch crossing in Surrey, B.C., from 1 to 2 p.m. PT.
  • NWT’s Deh Cho Bridge between 2 and 4 p.m. MT.
  • The Canadian side of the Blue Water Bridge in Sarnia, Ont., for one hour. Sarnia police said the bridge would be closed in both directions from noon until 1 p.m.
  • The Peace Bridge between Fort Erie and Buffalo in the Niagara region, starting at 1 p.m. ET. Organizers say it will be “peaceful,” and they will occupy only one lane of traffic on the international bridge.
  • A disruption is also planned at the Queenston/Lewiston Bridge between Niagara Falls and Niagara on the Lake.

CTV News adds:

Onion Lake Cree Nation Chief Wallace Fox said the main reason behind the protests was the passing of Bill C-45.

Protesters say First Nations lands and treaty rights are being infringed upon through the government’s contentious omnibus budget bill.

“This is something that many First Nations have always wanted to get the general public to understand,” said Fox.

“We never relinquished any of the resources. We never ceded any of the resources, the minerals, that was not part of the treaty.”

The day’s actions follow a Friday statement from the movement that vowed it was “here to stay” and that it would continue to work for its goals of “Indigenous sovereignty (Nation to Nation relationship) and protection of the land and water (Social and Environmental Sustainability).”

Continue reading at:  http://www.commondreams.org/headline/2013/01/05-1

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The Real Causes of Divorce — America Has to Stop Blaming It on Women

From Alternet:  http://www.alternet.org/visions/real-causes-divorce-america-has-stop-blaming-it-women

Stereotypes about women’s behavior totally obscure the driving forces that can split a marriage.

By Lynn Stuart Parramore
January 4, 2013

A recent poll revealed a clear tendency to blame women for not keeping their husbands happy and a habit of viewing divorced women as unwanted and pitiable.

That was in the United Arab Emirates. But what about the United States of America? You’d think a more enlightened view of women and marriage might prevail.

Think again. The Huffington Post ran a front-page piece just this week with a headline that would make any old-school patriarch proud: “Women: Five Reasons Your Divorce Is Your Fault.” The author, self-appointed intimacy expert Laura Doyle, spent several paragraphs hectoring women for sins including “Taking the same approach at home as you do at work” and “Rejecting his efforts to make you happy.” She reserves special scorn for present-day Lysistratas who are cruelly “withholding sex” from their partners, as if they were using sex as a punishment rather than simply too tired or not aroused enough to want it. Doyle’s “remedy” for this transgression? Consider making yourself available for sex at least once a week in support of your mutual goal of connecting.” Problem solved!

Yes, it appears that right here in 2013, somebody is paying Ms. Doyle to expound on the following fantastically stupid credo: “I teach intimacy skills, but not to couples and not to men. I only teach them to women because we are the ones who have the power to make our relationships intimate.”

Those who can, teach. Those who can’t, teach intimacy, evidently.

In Doyle’s binary universe, wives are tasked with creating intimacy in the home and men are emotionally deficient beings who require their guidance. This is a 21st-century redo of the famous “Angel in the House” motif common in Victorian culture, in which women were meant to radiate moral purity and emotional balance for men who were off dealing with the slings and arrow of the outside world. By criticizing women for bringing work skills and attitudes into the home, Doyle reveals her nostalgia for the days when women were financial dependents in marriage. “If all we’ve ever been taught is how to get ahead in school and career,” she moans, “but not how to foster intimacy, it’s pretty hard to change hats when the work day is done and we want a loving, supportive home.” Apparently keeping a roof over that loving, supportive home is an afterthought.

Continue reading at:  http://www.alternet.org/visions/real-causes-divorce-america-has-stop-blaming-it-women

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